Cream City Classic 2019 Race Report

Last swim: Saturday 8:10 and 8:15 am at 
Public Pier at N. Jackson St and E. Eire St
Next Swim  Noon Sunday at Klode Park
Water temp: 70 per itch-o-meter - see story about that below
Clarity: umm....clearer than last year.  Still brown but not as dense?
Waves: flat
Current:  I could swear there was a very slight current running upstream at the beginning, where water was flowing in from the lake, and then the current switched to downstream right around where the Menomonee River and Milwaukee Rivers intersected. 
Kru: Mr. Bubble, Itch, Scuba Steve, Gumdaug Moondrop. Sir James, my neighbor, Karen  
Shore Support:  Pool Noodle, Mrs. Bubble

Before I get into the long, funny story about the lead up to the race, I'll cut to the most important part  Sir James once again was first place overall and set a new course record.  He won some dope prizes, too!

Stories about the lead up to the race start on Thursday afternoon, when they send out their "We're good to go" e-mail.  At the bottom of this message, they say:

See below for the full report from Milwaukee Riverkeeper.

Water quality at the two upstream sites were both below the federal recreational use standard for E. coli of 235 MPN/100 ml (MPN=Most Probable Number) for much of the week and the most recent sample measured 100 MPN/100 ml for both sites. The starting point for the race registered higher levels of E. coli earlier in the week, but were still at levels that were below the beach closure standard in Wisconsin of 1000 MPN/100 ml for E. coli. The most recent sample for the Erie St. site was 300 MPN/100 ml of E. coli, so slightly above the recreational standard. The testing method that we use tends to overestimate bacteria levels. MMSD has had no sewage overflows since March.

This may have been too much information for some people.  Turned out that 7 of the 90 people who registered bailed.  Didn't matter to me because I didn't see it until almost 24 hours later.

The other e-mail I didn't read until after the race came out at 4:37 am saying:
Hello again swimmers!  A quick heads up that the water temperature is a bit cooler this year than last year- about 60 degrees Fahrenheit.  You are allowed to wear a wetsuit if you would like.

So, I'm blissfully ignorant of all these facts when I arrive on the scene, and the first thing I hear from my friend Karen is that the water is 60 degrees.  She's concerned because she has some physiological issues that make it hard for her body to adjust to cold water.  Another guy I met down there, Blake (who I invited to come swim with us sometime) is pre-occupied about the water temperature, too.  Should he wear a wetsuit?  Karen is pre-occupied with that question, too, as are other people I run into.  

Then, our hero, Itch arrives on the scene.  He's already done his thing with the itch-o-meter at two different spots on the course, and his verdict is a very firm 70 degrees from both measurements.  The people who were anxious about the temperature are now both anxious AND confused.   How could the two readings  be so far off?  Can we really believe the itch-o-meter reading over the official reading?  Itch has no doubts of course, and neither do I really.  Even if I did have doubts, there's nothing I can do about it - I hadn't read the e-mail so I just brought my trunks and Roka shorts assuming it was going to be 74 again this year.  No need to agonize over a decision about whether to wear a wet suit.  

They start the Safety Briefing and announce "That water is 60 degrees.  That's REALLY cold. so you might want to wear a wetsuit".  Of course, I wanted to yell out "Bah humbug!  Fake news!  I trust Itch!", but I held my tongue during the briefing.  Afterwards, I approached the announcer to politely ask "When did you take the river's temperature?"  He responds emphatically "60 degreees!".  "Yes, I heard that, but what time did you take that temperature?  My friend here has just measured it as 70 degrees".  "Yeah, it was earlier this morning.  I hear it may have warmed up a little bit in places".  

Needless to say, the itch-o-meter was right, and afterwards, my friend Karen made a Facebook post about wearing a wetsuit that wasn't needed.  She admitted that she should have trusted the itch-o-meter instead!  

Itch was my hero once again after the race...he sought me out and offered a shot of Killepitsch, which I gracefully accepted.  He offered Mrs. Bubble one, too, which she declined.  Then one of them noticed I had a scratch on my finger, and it was bleeding.  OMG!  an open wound exposed to Milwaukee River water!  What will happen?  This serves as the inspiration for Itch's toast - Blood on the Water!!